I went to spinning class this morning and ended up staying after to do some weights. Mrs. A asked me this week why I love spinning so much and my answer was simple: I shut my mind off for one hour.
For one hour, I think about my breathing, my form, and pushing myself. I appreciate the benefits of yoga, but there is something about fighting the resistance on the bike that is cathartic for me. It's been a wonderful start to a beautiful Saturday in Arizona. I love that I am still wearing shorts and a t-shirt out of the house at 8 am.
This week has gone by so smoothly, it's been a nice mental break to only be in charge of the junior classes. I had them create an ongoing Facebook news feed instead of doing the generic plot summary and the students were SO into it. They were bantering about which status update should go first and who should end their relationship. On Monday, they are going to be planning their Reality TV worthy confessional--they will be recording a dramatic monologue in groups of 3 about events in Act I and Act II of The Crucible. I'm happy that some of my random ideas have come to fruition and worked out. Teaching has become a passion for me and I hope that I can find somewhere to continue working after I graduate.
Mrs. A wanted to have a 'serious talk' about my future one of the mornings this week and I can't explain why I became so flustered. She was reiterating that I should pursue teaching abroad for 2 reasons: I have no obligations here and I will make more money. I'm not afraid to go alone or anything. I've re-discovered my sense of independence and solitude (finally...) but it is bittersweet. I don't really want to go on these adventures alone anymore, I want someone to share the experiences with. The other alternative is to stay in Arizona and apply for the Teen Program Coordinator position at BGCS in May. The only problem is that it's MAY and not MARCH, another 3 months of part time work when I have my Masters degree. Not ideal, however when I was pushing Kayleigh on the swings yesterday, carrying around two little people on my legs, she was screaming "Bye whoever is pooping!" over and over and over again..giggling like no other. The kids are so incredible and sweet. I have a student who is more than angry at the universe for what has happened in his life, we had a good 'beginning' conversation on Friday, and I think I want to pull him aside and ask if he would want to volunteer at BGCS. There is nothing more therapeutic than walking into the building after a long day and having a bunch of kids run up to you to give you a hug. They're fantastic. I know I have previously been complaining about my 7am-7pm schedule, but I go from one place I love to another place I love. I think that's a blessing I briefly lost sight of. Yesterday, the hospitality teacher was going to throw away all these awesome carved pumpkins and I asked if I could give them to the kids that didn't have a pumpkin this year and she was totally into it--another person's trash is somebody else's treasure :)
Last night was really interesting for a couple of reasons. One, I confessed to Jamie that I secretly worry I'm going end up a cat lady. Two, I received a text message "wish u were here to snuggle," from Eric.
Let's just say 'you've got to be kidding me' to both of them.
Jamie was hilarious and gave me hope, she said a cat lady at her work recently found love online and moved with all 3 of her cats to marry her man candy. There is hope for the hopeless ;) On the second, Eric's message went UNRETURNED. Had I really slightly cared, I would have texted him back and said "isn't that the same message you sent to the other girls when WE were DATING?" Poor guy. He keeps trying. I honestly think in his mind we're going to get married someday. Absolutely not. He texted me a few times this week, that obviously went all unreturned. He even had the audacity to ask if he could come to Scottsdale last night and stay at my place and then leave the next day. It took everything not to say, "If you think you are ever going to have sex with me again, you're out of your mind. Done. Over. Never Again." Eric is...a learning lesson. A brief history on the life and times of our 3 year relationship: tons of laughter, no fighting, and a case of cheating. Eric always tells me he has changed and that our relationship was perfect (until he screwed it up..which he insists would NEVER happen again..right). He's very charming, handsome, and funny. He is a venus fly trap. I gave him a pseudo second chance after a fated meeting in London, two years ago. We met outside Buckingham Palace and spent the entire day together. Random and romantic. After I got back from Spain, he came to visit the first weekend I was home and I briefly considered the possibility that we would work out. Until the next weekend, (the weekend he was supposed to visit), photos of him and one of the girls he slept with when we were dating popped up on my newsfeed. That was the end of Eric. Beautiful promises that lack any meaning whatsoever. With guys like Eric, you have to see behind the facade. I ended it by declaring, "Your word is your bond and your word means absolutely nothing." I'm sure you can find some sort of bitter, disheartened farewell to Eric in my blogs from September, 2009. Fortunately, I have learned my lesson--that door is closed and locked.
Dead bolted.
The sad truth of it is, is that cliche text messages like that actually woo some women. I'm sure Eric is 'that guy' for a lot of girls. I'm 24, I don't want to SNUGGLE with you. It's black and white--we're so over we need a new word for over. In the words of Just Friends, "Another bee in the hive." No thanks. I'd rather be a cat lady.
Jamie and I decided I need to write a book about my dating blunders over the past couple of years. Epic. I regaled Kristin with the best of last night...we stayed up until 1 am laughing and cringing. Men these days are out of their minds.
In the words of Charlotte from Sex and the City, "I've been dating since I was fifteen! I'm exhausted! Where is he?"
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