It took awhile to figure out she could run and when she did she was long..long gone.

Mornings are my favorite time of day. I have a routine then. I wake up, go put on a pot of coffee, have a piece of toast and cut up bananas and strawberries and sprinkle them into my cereal. Have fiber juice. Catch up on the world of television and have some quiet time. But then the rest of the day is...unpredictable. I opted not to go to class..I feel guilty about it, honestly. I'm either on point and focused or I am all over the place. God, i just want to shake myself. Snap out of it, wake up and get moving!!

Anyways, I went on yet another amazing run today. When i'm running I like to feel like i'm running from things...Escaping...running from the annoyances and frustrations of life. Running from the people that bring me down and kicking dust onto them. The difference between me in my real life and the me during my runs is that when i'm running, i'm moving past all the dilemmas, letting things go and going forward; but in my real life i'm frozen and drudging through the muck. muck. I can be pissed as all hell and when i get to the base of the hill, it fuels me, and I run and run and sprint and push off my feet as hard as i can so when I get to the top I feel like I pushed the anger out of me. And I take a deep breath and exhale all the tension in my body. out..out out and away into the air, somewhere away from me.

Emotions are a crazy thing, I suppose all the time I spent running in highschool from "real life," things caught up with me in college; I have to confront my father..and my issues with relationships and people..but I have never had to do that before and i'm lost.

I feel accomplished when I keep going, even though I'm tired and my legs are aching and my lungs are screaming for a minute of reprieve--but I keep pushing. Mind over matter..Mind over matter..it's my mantra these days. It's supposed to hurt, that's the challenge; overcoming the hurt to run another mile and another one after that. Finish the hill even though your hamstrings are sore--but you can keep going, that's the beauty of the human body. you can do amazing things; if only you allow yourself to go beyond the pain to something more..you just keep going. keep running until you decide that you are finished. and when you go up that last hill, feeling the fire lighting up your feet, battling the desire to quit and just walk it...feel the sunshine on your face; something, maybe the demons inside you, fuel you and you just go and take off til the top.