my mom called this morning and i told her about the email, minus the "Self-centered like your mother" abomination. She told me that he will never change and he is projecting his misgivings on me. She reminded me that i have never been mean to him and that "family" is about unconditional love. People will love you in spite of your bad qualities and admire you for your good traits, unconditionally. She said that I should print out his e-mail, put it in my diary and look at it when I question why my father and I do not have a relationship.
She told me never to blame myself because that's a heavy burden I should not weight on myself. So i spent the morning scrubbing the kitchen, microwave included. I changed the vac bag and cleaned up my room. This morning when I woke up I washed off the smudged mascara and put cool water to ease the swolleness of my eyes. It feels like a bad dream.
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